Bransholme Calypso Bransholme High no longer exists but if you  ever went there
 you may recognize the people.

If you work at Bransholme High there' are things you should know
Why some people stay and others go
I'll tell you who they are and what we know
I've started the Bransholme Calypso
It's sad ....but true
Most of the teachers don't know what to do
As this is so I've put them in the Bransholme Calypso

Mr X  Teaches Science in a funny was
When the kids come to his lesson they have to pay
When it comes to GCSE's the kids are weak
But most of them can spot a priceless antique
Don't laugh......., don't scoff
X's lesson's start where Arthur Negas leaves off
It's true...... believe me
Most of his class practice alchemy

Dr X  has a plan to try and stay sane
Spends most of his spare time shooting game
So if the kids play you up or life gets dull
Just shove them in his class room and then shout "PULL"
It works ......quite well
Just last week he shot most of 4L
It never...... fails
Not when he keeps the head and tail

Teaching German at Bransholme must be pretty tough
Mr XX  wants to leave , he's had enough
He doesn't mind the grammar or irregular verbs
But the jack-boots and the helmets get on his nerves
It's not..... much fun
Teaching kids who's only hero is Atilla the Hun
But they know..... who's boss
Every week he awards someone with an Iron Cross

Mrs X runs Bransthwaite with great success
They say she did her training with the German SS
I'm told  she likes gliding but I know the facts
She's the only teacher here to win the Blue-Max
It's true, bet
She hasn't missed a Luftwaffer reunion yet
She's known quite well
Goering used to call her his "blonde bomb shell"

There are many more teachers I could go on
You can stop sweating now 'cos I've finished the song
But don't be too relieved I've still got time
To write another verse if you step out of line
It's true,....... this song
Should be 100 verses long
But I have to stop
By the look I'm getting I'm for the chop